Saturday, December 26, 2009

Milk, milk, milk!



MILK!
I sit here at 4 am pumping in my mother's kitchen. I don't know what I did to deserve this but my milk production is up and I couldn't be happier. How lucky am I to be able to make so freaking much! I awoke to a very sore right boob, so I came out to pump a couple ounces to make the pain go away and make it easier for little one to eat. I siphoned of 5+ ounces.. what the heck! Did I over do the water last night? Or did little one let me go to bed with some milk in there... I was pretty sure they were pretty empty when we went to bed. eh?

So granted with all this milk production, I feel like i drown the little guy some times. Anyone else get that? He drinks so much, and he spits up soooo much, but he's still like in the 90th percentile for weight, I guess I shouldn't be worried unless he stops gaining weight. Ah.. the things we do for love... pump pump pump ... the lovely sound of the machine stirs up my mom's dachshunds. They bark at it... at 4 am I feel bad for the rest of the house!

Christmas.
For Gus' first Christmas we are down in Florida in the warm tropical air. He's enjoyed being in his lighter clothes and of course my mom ensured he had enough of the cutie outfits for the weather. He was able to see his uncle Stanley and his cousin Daniel so far, and hopefully we will see Aunt Cari soon enough, the days have flow by that we have been here and soon we will return to our cooler temperatures and snow covered yard. Hopefully the propane guys will have refilled our tanks too... we ran out last week and they are backed up since the great snow! Gus has missed his first and second snow of the season, but we will get to see it soon enough!

Hand in Mouth.
Gustave has made wonderful strides in exercise. He can shove his hand to his face and actually suck on it for a while. He's getting pretty good at getting his little hand in there. And his head holding capability is up, he is steadier than ever! We are so excited! He loves standing in mommy or daddy's lap and enjoys sitting up watching the rest of us around the table. It's super cute. He also has been known to carry on conversations with is grandmother lately, during a couple moments in the day he gets quiet chatty and will carry on a discussion of goos and laughter, it's amazing how we learn the two way discussion at such a young age. I can't wait to hear that first word. It's just wondrous how we have survived as a species with the slow development.. think about it. Birds have a few weeks and they are up and running on their own, dogs get a couple months and they are self sufficient, we go a few years... before we can even use the bathroom and "eat" on our own... ha. It's wild, or I should say domestic!

Well I need to get myself and my udders back to bed so I can get some rest and hopefully Gus will sleep through the rest of the night. He has been waking around 3 for the last three days fussing and getting fed, so we will see, he wouldn't take the teet this 3 am, but watch.. I will go back to bed.. and he will be ready now. Eh.. boys. Good night everyone!

Monday, December 21, 2009

2 plus months and 15 pounds!











Ahhh Florida, it's so much warmer here although it is 50 degrees this morning it beats the 20 degree weather back in Annapolis. But I am missing the snow for the second time this year.. go figure.








Gustave and I flew down Tuesday morning to be with my mother, and it has been a welcome comfort to be able to go for a run in the mornings. We also got Gustave a running stoller (that's good for all around) and a playard for here in Florida. Figure we will be back here soon enough especially as the weather gets warmer and we can come use the pool. Did I tell you how great he was on the plane? Granted flying with a child adds challenges, especially when he doesn't walk and his mother doesn't want the stroller. I took him in the baby bjorn.. I enjoy wearing him and it makes it easier to move around. But it's a chore to eat or potty with him on me. LOL!

Running
So I have ran a total of 9 miles this week, done some calesthenics, mall walking and today we did stair stepper to preserve my feet which have been hurting me for some time. I think since pregnancy they are still healing away. We will see. But it's been great running. They put a sidewalk down my mother's street so it's an easy three miles to the end of the road and back. Not bad for starting back out. Granted I am running and walking here and there but still getting about three miles in 35 minutes, and that's not too bad. I did see three hawks and one bobcat this week. The bobcat was huge. When it jumped out of a neighbor's yard I felt my heart sink and thought it was more of a gargoyle coming at me, but it looked my way turned and looked around before running across the street. It was huge, like a large doberman, and it was all cat... he was neat. I am glad he went the other way though, I don't think his teeth would have been comforable.

Cooking
I am not a huge fan of celery but I saw some celery root in the store the other day and swore that AB (alton brown) had made a puree with some. So I grabbed two roots, two turnips and a couple small potatoes and viola made a puree. I unfortunately stunk the house up with celery, my mother opened the whole place up.. she was a bit over taken, and in the end it was a much lighter fare than regular mash potatoes, but I will use less celery root next time and more turnip and potatoe.. but My brother and mom agreed last night it went well with the lamb chops and some naan bread.. can't complain there. I think I am creating some form of veggie lasagna tonight.. joy! I need to go out and get mozzeralla though. We also need xmas lights so either way I am going to make a trip out today. I think I can get it all in one shopping center if I work quick though during Gustave's nap times.

Shopping
Speaking of shopping, we took Gustave to see Santa in his new wheels. It was the first time Gustave rode in a forward facing stroller but he seemed to like it, if not overwhelmed really. He loved seeing people and everyone loved seeing him. He laughed with every new face he saw. It was totally cute! I think he's still a bit small for the stroller but he was very comfortable in it from what we could tell. But when he can't see anyone he got bothered I must say. So yes, I did say we braved the mall in the end and santa was fun even though Gustave was all awake while we were in line, as soon as it was our turn Gustave was tired, sleepy and just not cooperative for the photo.. oh well.. we still got a cute shot in the end.
What else did we do this week... I have such a fuzzy memory since he has come along.. he is just so precious and takes up all my attention, time and effort. It's difficult even carving out time to write this blog and shower! But we will prevail!

Great Aunt and Uncle Klenk
So we also made a car trip up to Fort Pierce to visit his great aunt and uncle! The rains were horrible but we braved the trip and drove the hour north to meet them at a small restaurant (Mangrove Maddy's) and enjoyed some lunch. It was great having them meet us half way because anything over an hour needs diaper changes and feedings. I don't know how we are going to make it up and back from Orlando later this week to see his cousin... well it will just be super difficult for me and him... I am not looking forward to the travel to say the least. Maybe I can invite them down for a day... if they are willing.
GUSTAVE
So it's another day and I invite you to check out his youtube site later. www.youtube.com/littlegustave I am putting more video out of him just being generally cute~! i love him so much, watching new developments is fun.. he can now grab a bit and holds onto clothes and hair, and he tried to sit up yesterday while he was in my lap! Yes sit up is what I said.. not spit up.... although he does that a loootttt... icky! I can just sit and watch him for hours. enjoy!












Sunday, December 13, 2009

It's 3:30 a.m.

It's early and I am pumping. I must have drank too much water before bed. Instead of getting up to pee a million times, I have to get up to pump or risk leaking everywhere and achy boobs.

Gustave wasn't hungry so I had to take care of business. The risk here is that if he gets hungry I have just drained his supply, doh. So now the decision is do I freeze it or just drop it in the fridge for now? I think I will freeze it. I have about 5 ounces of milk left over from yesterday still (had to pump yesterday too). So let's hope he sleeps. He ate at 2 a.m. last, and 10 pm before that (he's been sleeping in between, and he's sleeping soundly besides Neil right now... ok well he was fussing a little here and there with gas, I gave him drops though). So now I have to drink a ton of water before going back to bed. I wonder how much goes to pee and how much goes to milk. I feel like I make more milk than pee... haha.

OK, well enough of my milk adventure. I am going back to bed.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

More learning experiences.



Thanksgiving came and went and all of a sudden I feel like the world is counting down to the largest hallmark holiday of the year (which I think is actually Valentines, but roll with me). We ran through the mall today picking up a couple things and realized we about two weeks away from the big day! It's just amazing how times flies. Gus is getting bigger by the minute. Yup, as I click on the monitor (he's actually in bed before 10! - it's only 8:30pm), I can see him growing.

So what did we do all month, besides not blogging... shame on me!

Mom (or Grandma now), brother Marc and brother James came to Maryland to celebrate a wonderful Thanksgiving on the Annapolis water front. As usual our son was wonderful and slept the whole meal. He normally sleeps when we go out to dinner. It's rare that he's bad when we are out.. except when we are out with this one particular couple.. hm... nah.. it's a coincidence. Although I am going to keep my eye on that one... hmm. Interesting.

Travels
So Thanksgiving came and went and then my birthday popped up and I got a wild hair to take off to Long Island for a long weekend. So the night of my bday I hopped a Southwest flight for $80- and went to have pizza with my brother and Gus. It was fun! (Oh did I tell you Neil took me to Real Seafood.. and I got some neat gifts). Sure. So that was awesome, Gus got to meet Nanna, ma granahan, Roger and his fiancee, Tom and his girlfriend, Harmony and Gaving and Conner, Eddie, the Johnsons and Great uncle Mark and great aunt Karen to name a few. So it was great, we ran around like nuts and saw everyone, but for me it was wonderful to have adult company. Neil drove up on Friday night to help with this trip and to drive us down on Sunday afternoon. We did enjoy pizza and cookies and bagels - all the NY goodies we miss.

So flying with the little one.. I almost forgot to mention it since it was so unremarkable. Our flight was only 40 minutes. On the way up I nursed little Gustave and he never said a peep. He was cozy and comfy and slept or nursed the whole trip. It was wonderful and I can only hope he's such a saint when we fly Wednesday on our way to Florida. It's only a 2 hour flight so I hope that even if he's fussy.. well we will make it! We are flying in the morning when he's normally napping so hope that will help.

Spit happens.
So our son seems to be in the group of children who spit up a lot. It's cheesy a lot of the times and makes it rather yucky to hold him.. ewww... but sometimes it's straight skim milk too. I suppose other moms know these issues, but I was in child care the other day and my caretaker said that the other three babies she has don't have much spit up, but they are also two months older. More on that when we start child care which we are testing on Tuesday I think.

So yes, sometimes our little pooping machine spits up three or four times! But I must say when it's inconvenient he normally doesn't. So when we are out to eat he's normally wonderful! I guess it's all about not moving him around too much!

Sleeping in the Wet Spot.

Lactation, what a miracle of nature, but what a bummer to sleep next to. I leak! Or rather they leak! So when Gustave does not nurse at night I normally will wake around 5 or 6 am to a puddle of milk! As if waking up with spit up and a baby that takes up most of the bed isn't bad enough now a puddle of milk!

You thought I was going to talk about sex. Ok, well I can go there too. We gave it a whirl the other day- they leaked then too! But we will not be doing much of that, because as most women I have read about on babycenter.com, it's still very painful! And it's weird pain, I am not going to get into gross details, but it's totally new pain and discomfort. I don't recommend it! Tell him to take a hike for a while. That and you don't want to waste your precious milk. It just kept leaking everywhere, I was laughing, and it kept leaking... yeah very unproductive for "adult" behavior. LOL.

Baby Clothes, 0-3 don't do it!
Gustave is working himself out of most of his clothes. Now I know what the lady at the store meant when she said she bought mostly 6 month clothes when she had her son. It's almost pointless to buy newborn size and don't buy too many 0-3 either! The dryer will shrink a few items, and then they are only in them for about a month and a half. It's silly. Plus he just wears a lot of onsies with bibs. So if you are a shopaholic, buy outfits that have matching bibs. You will need them in the spit up stages. Oh and putting pants on a baby, annoying (in a sing song voice)!
Those little outfits that are all in one jumpsuits I find easier. That and you don't have to worry about socks if it has footies.

Tuesday we get shots, more on that after Tuesday. Ok, well Gustave is sleeping and I should take advantage and get my arse to bed. It's 9pm.. good enough for me!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Monday

I am supposed to be at work. Neil said it's a bad day. So I am going to have to wing it and do what I can. I can take care of this and that this morning and then leave the babe with Neil. Fun. I need to square away child care!

Ok, so the days are flying by, I can't believe it's December tomorrow!

Motherhood has been a joy but it has put into perception how much time we as humans waste on the BS. Life is too short, and there are more important things, but how do you shrug it all aside. I feel guilty because I want to return to work, I feel guilty that I have to put the little man in Child care, I hate it. But I am excited he will meet other babies and have an opportunity to socialize himself so he can make friends as he grows. But I will miss all our day time breastfeedings. I am not looking forward to pumping at work. No siree. But it's what I am going to have to do, period. I fear it all, but I feel like I want to be in the Navy again too! Neil doesn't seem to understand that. Do the men really get it? Do they understand? I wish I could just stay home and that would make it better.

OK, well we are going to get Gus' belly button check out today, medical paperwork for child care, dental for me hopefully - I am sure I have a couple cavities and then try to organize this house a bit. It's a nightmare!!!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Christine Canons?

So if you had a Porn Star name what would it be?

Christine Canons.

I awoke at 5 am today having slept all night ! Gus did not wake me once and he was next to me all night long!!!! I couldn't believe it! I am not sure if the baby woke me (he was farting a storm - and struggling to get them out) or if the pressure valves of my breasts were bursting. They were rock hard and super uncomfortable. Gustave was too asleep and it would be too frustrating for him to try to siphon some milk off so I went and pumped... 6 ounces came out!!! In like 10 minutes!!! And he still had left overs! The body is an incredible machine!!!!

So that was my morning - well that and the first time since the doctor cleared me of my 6 week check up. I got an IUD installed yesterday. For those reading that don't know what that is (some of our men) it's a little copper (in my case) bar that is put in the cervix and that will be birth control - it will prevent eggs from becoming babies in my body. So that stung a little yesterday in the doctor's office, but well, we will see. To say the least this morning I found out that my body is not totally ready for the spelunking.

I am ready to go back to work though. The doctor said something that rang clearly in my mind yesterday. He said are you taking any time to yourself - are you enjoying time for you. And I answered with the fact that breastfeeding allows me to slow down and enjoy just the baby and the whole experience. He shook his head and rephrased the question. Is your husband taking the baby off your hands and allowing you to get out and go to the mall or just do stuff for yourself, I looked at him rather perplexed, and quietly answered, "no, not really". Hmm... yes I have to ask for more time from Neil but we also have a house to work on, it's a balance we have to achieve. But I was due back to work today and well, guess what, Neil was too far behind with work so I had to stay with the little one, not that I mind but I was looking forward to a few minutes doing something I love. sigh. Thankfully my mother flies in today and my brother will be in town too. I am looking forward to the extra hands and support. I feel like my errands are piling up! The Bank, pick up thread to finish the curtains, post office to mail and ebay sale, make a few returns at a few different stores, drop off paperwork at work for my baby leave, extend my leave, work on some "take home work projects" that I was trying to accomplish. Ugh.. it just seems there is a million little things but Gustave tethers me to a two hour limit on things or well causes me to have to breastfeed on the road, which is ok, but uncomfortable sometimes.

Ok that's my vent today - If I only had anohter set of hands like Shiva does I would be blessed to be able to accomplish more! Well if Gustave didn't want to be held all the time either! He just loves being held or in his vibrating bouncy.

((Sigh))... Oh how I love this little man but what great changes he brings to life!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Sweat and Tears and new uniforms.



Tears.

His tear ducts have developed! Now he can really cry it out! J/K... He was crying the other day and we noticed his tears came in! He has also started practicing holding his head up, and its entirely amusing to watch him do so. He gets really quiet, up noggin', wobble wobble, down noggin', take break, up, down, wobble, it's adorable. The only thing I wish he would change is the time of day he decides to do it, it seems it's always 730-8pm he starts playing around and wanting to seriously interact with us. Must be his internal clock. I remember when I was pregnant that is when he really would kick about.

So many little milestones to celebrate! One of the biggest is the fact he has outgrown his newborn onsies, so we are moving out of some of his first month's clothing. He's so cute too, he just seems to get cuter each day - I stare at him constantly.

Gustave seems to be getting so big so fast. I pick him up and he feels heavier, I suppose that will keep happening! I better start using a boppy or pillow to feed this young man just to help hold him up. I now know why people would need one. I was beginning to wonder it's worth.

Sweat.

I went for a run Saturday morning and this morning I also hope to get another small one in to help me get back into my groove. It's still rough but it was easier than the first day a few weeks ago. I have been trying to weigh myself in on the Wii Fitness scale and it seems I have stopped loosing weight magically, I will have to work a little harder to get the last 25 pounds off. I am weighing in at 140 as of this morning (and last week too).

I also find that I am still sweating profusely some nights, but it was not as bad as some people made it seem. I suppose the hormones are still leaving the body as my hair still has yet to fall out...

Well it's 0615 am and Neil is putting Gustave to sleep... we will see. Neil really is the one who suffers with the sleep loss. He does not like it one bit. But I can only hope that his sleeping patterns will adjust in time and Neil can regain some normal function again.

Clothes Shopping.

There is something that they should tell new mothers - Don't shop for new clothes until month 2 or 3 or 4. I went to the store the other day to buy a new uniform, figuring I was going to pop into work for a few days weeks before the xmas holiday. I had to try on a size 16 (they run really big... Pre-pregnancy I wore a size 5/6 in normal clothing and size 10 in uniforms), and when I looked in the mirror I was horrified. You have to understand that the female Khaki comes up to the natural waist, and with the extra weight sitting right around there, I look like super foopa. Oh it was scary and I tried on a larger shirt because of my newer chestier figure, and I just looked gi-normous. Oh it was sad, I took the clothes off quickly and threw them in the corner of the changing room opposite to where I had Gustave sitting watching the horror.

It doesn't end there. I continue to wear maternity pants but I want to get back into normal pants that have a button and so on. So I bought a pair of comfy North Face pants with zips that convert them to shorts if need be. I bought a size 8 - thinking this will be more than enough. Nope-wrong again - no tears, I just took them off very fast and returned them. Oh the horror. I think I will not do clothes shopping for another few weeks. And I can only hope that while my mother is here for Thanksgiving the topic will not come up. She can be vicious without ever meaning harm - she wanted me to buy a scale the last time she was here - I was mortified, and glad we never did pick one up.

Well off I go back upstairs (or do some work - doing some side work for a friend)... Gustave should be calmer now but if not, I am sure Neil will enjoy me taking him off his hands.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Gus celebrates 1 Month!


Celebrate, we have made it to one month and yes just as every other mother told me, it gets easier as time passes.

Gustave has become a wonderful eater and he even sleeps sometimes. But he has taken to biting a little - he will definitely let me know he is there sometimes! Other times he is just wonderful - every 2 hours (sometimes every hour when he's cranky), and at night he will go as long as 5 hours stints sometimes. Like I said, lucky! Breastfeeding certainly has it's challenges and has made me less modest in and of the least. I feel so "au natural"! I found out the Annapolis Mall has a Family area with private rooms to breast feed, so that makes mall walking easier... I have a place for us to do our thing.

The only major problem is wardrobe. My wardrobe has completely become challenged. I dress according on boob access. Yes, so I still don't get to try my clothes on - but that maybe a good thing. I am quiet sensitive as to the weight still, so it's probably better I do not try on any of my pre-pregnancy clothes just yet. Maybe a couple more weeks. (Sorry Harmony, I am still using one of your pants, I will send it soon!). Keeps me in a better mood!

I am also finally getting on an eating schedule for myself. Oatmeal in the morning keeps me going, yogurt and Fruit and Nut bars for snacks (and the occasional handful of brazil nuts), and lunch is usually a toaster muffin with cream cheese and maybe an egg. Dinner is different each day but I have been making large meals and freezing them as when I go back to work I think it will all be way more difficult. So stocking up on meals now!

Been storing milk too - for Gus. I have taken to pumping after all his meals. Basically I siphon off whatever he did not take and save it, once I reach 4-5 ounces of milk - it goes into the freezer. Figure he is going to need like 30 oz.s a day - so I need to stock up big time!! Or at least for that first day at day care when we have to drop him off... ugh..

So speaking of Day Care....
It is so difficult to find day care. The Family Care Moms from base have not called me back. The one we were excited about is booked, and the base day care is full still for infants. So now we are waiting, and it's a bit of a problem, I have to return to work! Ugh... so might have to hire a nanny if we can't get on post or off post. We will see. I am trying out a locater service to see if the can find me something available sooner.

Oh and the other big development is that Gustave is moving out of some of his newborn clothes. He's growing!!!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Baby Bottoms and Poop!


So babies bottoms are synonymous with diaper rash.

Poor little things! His bottom is too cute to be looking so painful! ! We have desitin and we have some aveeno Zinc stuff. . . but doesn't seem to be working. I suppose it does create a barrier and we are changing his diaper frequently but it just looks like it gets redder every time I change him!

Poor little guy! Breast-milk poop is really strange looking... looks like yellow cottage cheese.. eww. But it's normal from what we know! I ensured to google some pictures of baby poop... I know.. gross, but I wanted reassurance, and since we have information at our finger tips, hey why not?

So pooping your pants brings up a memory from a couple weeks ago just after giving birth. Incontinence was not only saved for my urine, but I was doing something and all of sudden I was like Neil.. got to go! I have to go! And well... I didn't make it to the bathroom. I think my mother was still here and it was early in the morning and I had a huge sanitary pad on so I saved my underwear but WOW. I was surprised, I had never! Poop, what a funny thing. I stopped taking my iron supplements (with my doc's blessing) so I would ensure to make soft poop so as not to irritate my newly acquired hemorrhoids. Yup, it was fine, coming off iron helped, and not taking my stool softners helped too (we were going too too soft) and I would like to proudly report that my hemorrhoids are just about gone! Yeah! I am so much more comfortable in that department now! But I did find, with the handy use of a mirror, that I still have all my stitches. I guess those will last a few more weeks. We will see.

So from the other end of Baby Gus, we have a lot of spit up! It's impressive sometimes how much curdled milk comes back up the wrong end. I feel so bad but he does not look too uncomfortable... except for the cold wetness that his clothes become. Needless to say we do a lot of laundry (daily affair) and have a lot of clothing changes. We also have to change mommy a few times a day if I don't get the burp cloth down in time. So we are getting more coordinated with burping and we found (thanks to Heather!!) that utilizing Mylicon for infant gas, helps tremendously! He has so much gas, at both ends! it hurts him and he's pretty up set by it, but these little drops, used at meals helps all the way!! Yeah!

OK... well enough for today about the wet things that come from my little man's orifices.

All our best!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

3 Weeks!


So Gustave and I are settling into a routine, or at least getting better acquainted with our roles as mother and baby. Finding out that babies make all sorts of noises and practice moving and making noise all day long. "They" are supposed to sleep 16 hours a day, but I do not think we are there yet.

He's also not in a feeding routine. Sometimes he want to eat all day - every top of the hour! It's amazing he can put all that food away! But then again he spits up a lot of milk too. Other days he can go 2-3 hrs no problem and we have a hard time waking him up to eat. So it's hit or miss still, I suppose in a month or two we will have some sort of routine for eating.

Gustave has his first bath on Halloween. Neil and I both hunched over the bath tub and put his little blue bath tub in there. He seemed to love the warm water, so he was easy to bathe, except he was so small he would slide around a lot. Hehe.. he also peed on me while we were waiting on his bath - boys pee a lot! He got me four times yesterday! I am learning to keep a diaper over the little launcher before turning my head to get the desitin.

At this point his belly button is fully healed (the stump fell off at day 7), a little scab is about to fall of his scalp where the heart monitor was screwed into his skin, his circumcision is fully healed just needs frequent cleaning (something called smegma accumulates). He's doing great. I think we may have some Thrush or acne on his face, looks harmless and doc says he's fine! He seems to have a few scratches on his face from his little sharp nails, so he wears a lot of shirts with mittens - best thing ever!

In fact for other first time moms out there - buy onsies that wrap under the diaper and that have mittens if you can. Shirts that do not snap on the bottom just end up around their chest constantly.

So for today's funnies...

Things I am learning as a first time mom in today's age:

1. My only connection to the outside world is Facebook

2. Blisters aren't just for feet any more! Discover Nipple Blisters - ouch! We will see how long it lasts. It showed up yesterday.

3. Hand writing Birth announcements was unnecessary as we already sent everyone pictures via email. But still, we went traditional and I did it anyways, it has taken me the past three weeks!

4. Laundry is a daily task. We go through a few outfits every day - it's amazing how many times you can spit up and pee on your clothes when you are only days old.

5. There is a difference between spit up and vomit - it's in the force.

6. It's ok to let the house cleaning slide. I have to let things go.

7. There is a need for extra hours in a day. I feel like I can't get everything done!

8. Women do better with less sleep, men don't.

9. Grandmothers cannot get enough pictures and share a special bond with the little guy. And baby talk is good for the little ones, they respond best to higher pitched voices.

10. Learn how to use the stroller/car seat prior to baby's arrival. In my first experience taking the car seat off the frame after a visit to the personnel department - I couldn't get the car seat off the frame!! I had to call Neil, in a slight frantic mood, and ask him to walk me through it! :0

11. Make sure if you are having a baby that you have a very comfy couch. I sit in my couch most of the day with him while we are getting used to breastfeeding. He barely lets me get up sometimes.

OK well it's been fun and just as everyone has told me it does get better. It seems every day he gets better at breastfeeding, which makes that easier and that I am getting used to getting him in and out of the car. Getting out of the house takes a lot more time now... More in weeks to come!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

The day in the life of Mom and Gustave - Week 3



Tuesday, Some random day in October... very close to Samhain I can figure...


0001 Neil is with baby downstairs on the couch

0230 Neil returns with baby Gus, reports he's been sleeping, they both have been

0235 Baby needs to be fed, but I hate to wake him up from his pack n' play.. I have a bad feeling...

0300 Gus eats but is wide awake now, we try walking, feeding more, turning him on his side, playing lullabys.. nothing. He's awake and gas is making him uncomfortable. Lots of spit up! Is this normal??

0400 I start to get weepy. He's spitting up everything I keep giving him but he keeps coming back for more????? Neil holds wee man for a few minutes before giving him back to me to feed.

0500 Neil needs sleep - he returns to bed as he actually has to go to work in a few hours.

0600 Gus is about asleep, so I bring him to bed, he sleeps better - I suppose because the bed is soft and I am wrapped around him keeping him warm.

0630 I am asleep, Neil is off to work... in a sleepy state I ask myself did little man just poop or poot?

0900 Wakey time and time to feed Gus! We get to eating. Change diaper - loaded!

1000 Shower time for me, wipe down for Gus. Get a plum from downstairs while Gus is calm in his playard... try to get a load of laundry going. I can hear Gus starting to cry... it eats at my soul... I go pick him up.. eww.. he has goo in his eye. Get tissue.. get goo out.. success! He's wide awake though...

1100 Gus in living room to his bassinet, crying, I am trying to slay some ants (we have an ant issue in the house) and working on some breakfast. Change diaper - just pee... Ok forgot I left breakfast out (I did this yesterday to my lunch too)... go back to making my oatmeal.. yum.. pick up Gus.. he's crying...

1115 Diaper change - just pee.... again... he pees a lot..

Try to eat over Gus while holding him. Found a solution.. put him on table, his head on my arm... and he dozes off.. ok.. he likes to be held... understatement! But now I can type on my keyboard too... mmm... little spit up.

Lots of farting again today... last night was same. He seems to have a lot of gas...

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Birth Story: Part II: Post Delivery

Our Hospital Stay - (11-13 Oct) Post Delivery.

The hospital stay was a night or two at the motel 6. I had no idea we would be there for three days. We checked in/admitted 10 October around lunch and were not released until 13 October just before lunch. But I must say we were we well taken care of.

So the first night was not much of a night, but we did get a few hours of sleep. The doctors/nurses kept coming in to do vital signs and check ups on me and the baby though. I also had the option for room service during meal times, room service!!

Neil had a couch to sleep on that pulled out and the nurses provided sheets and blankets. The first night was the only night he slept there alone. The hospital bed I had to sleep in was uncomfortable so I snoozed with him and most of the time with the baby - since he (little man) wanted to eat or at least try eating most of the time. Did I mention I was wearing the funky pink hospital gown the whole time? All open in the back to make my check ups and potty breaks easier? I had no modesty!

After the birth, my mom went to the Navy lodge for the night and we settled down for some rest.

12 Oct/Sunday - Neil picked up my mom who got a few hours of shut eye. I am glad she was able to relax and get a bit of rest. She was ecstatic to enjoy the baby during the day and we were able to get some rest. Mom and Neil also went out to get some breakfast treats from a local Madelines... yum yum! I highly recommend knowing eateries in the area of your hospital - send for food if youThe nurses were great too, they helped me getting him breastfeeding. (Definitely request a lactation consultant if you can).

The Mommy Diaper

As for my recovery, swollen feet and ankles, pain in my feet, numb toes, achy back, tired/exhausted/excited!, swollen face (all the edema was from all the fluids they pushed into me during labor), urinary incontinence, hemorrhoids and pain in the nether regions.

For my hoo-haha I was given ice pack sanitary napkins.. yes, the all in one! You pop them just like an instant ice pack and viola, cold huge sanitary napkin, but wait there's more. You put a chux pad (google it) under the pad and in your lovely hospital issued mesh underwear!


Huge oversized pads
Chux pads (like the ones they put under your hiney at the OB/GYN)

Very exciting stuff... what gets better is that every time I peed, I have to use this little water bottle (and I still am) to wash the area up and then recreate the mommy diaper since I normally peed a little on in trying to get to the toilet in a hurry and the mess of the afterbirth. Yup, all the fun stuff of recovery. Just be prepared for taking your time and drink plenty of fluids. And in the words of Harmony Skillman, "take the stool softener". Yes, do it! It will help you pass the poo much easier since you will have hemorrhoids, but don't go too many days with it, I got a bit of diarrhea by the sixth day... so now I am good and will take them as necessary.

So lot's of peeing, some poop, and lots of foot swelling. So as my body started getting rid of the fluids my swelling went down. My face was so puffy too, so was little man's but that I am sure was because he squeezed his way out (or got pulled really).

Urinary Incontinence

I peed myself - advice for new mothers - just after birth, be cautious, go to the bathroom often, use the perineum shower bottle... and just be patient with your body - it's been through a lot.

I didn't make it to the toilet seat about four or six times... Yes I peed on my feet, the seat, myself... I laughed, there was nothing more I could do. Clean it up and try to make it sooner next time.

Food at the Hospital

If someone offers take it! My mom and Neil and a local friend - Lynn Carbone, took care of us so very well. I had french pastries two days and a home cooked meal from Lynn the third day. It was wonderful! The help is underrated, I was able to take naps and get some rest between feedings. Having mom there was helpful. Eat though! You need the energy!
Looking at yourself afterward

I was so curious when I was at the hospital. When I took a shower I took a look at what was left of my body. I suppose I must have lost about 15 pounds during my hospital stay... 7 lb baby, 1-2 placenta... fluids (amniotic fluid, pee). Eh.. not sure, but it's about a week later and I am about 20 lbs lighter than the week before delivery. So must be a good sign! I am loosing weight yeah!! I weighed in at the doctor's yesterday (9 days after deliver) and I was 147 lbs. Ugh.. it's so difficult to look at. So back to the visual. I will have to take a picture too.

My tummy was so squishy just after... it felt like jello. It was so lose, like your grandmother's arms! LOL! Well ok so it was funny and it hung there and it felt strange as I walked around, it seemed to flop around. Walking was challenging, not because of the stitches, but because it just felt like everything was going to fall out from between my legs. I felt shaky and uncomfortable, almost like I had done too many sit ups combined with bad gas! I don't know it just felt odd and had yet not taken any Tylenol or Motrin for any pain (I have not at all actually and they supplied me with both in case I need them). I didn't want to touch down there either, it was just freaky not being able to see it (belly hanging in the way, and generally not being able to bend appropriately yet).

When I got home though I broke out the mirror... umm... yeah... so it was red, duh, I found my three stitches carefully. They ache now! They out right hurt really. Umm... everything was a little messed up and well... oh well, it's healing. Doc said it was fine, and it would heal no problem, he never had a case of someone getting infected or having problems. Lovely right? Well anyways, it's healing and I am sure in a few weeks (6 week follow up) my doc will find it all well.

OK enough about my nether regions.

If you are pregnant, just be prepared, you loose all inhibitions, I used the pot with the door open, I just didn't care, everyone was checking everything out. Every time the nurses came by they would check where my uterus was (to make sure it was shrinking and firmness) and they would check my mommy diaper to see how my bleeding was. My bleeding is fine damn it. It slowed quickly and is not too bad now even (10 days after delivery).

Good News: Everyday the belly is getting smaller! I can't wait till it goes down a bit more and I can see the goodies again!

More in the weeks to come!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

A Birth Story: Part I: Gus' Grand Entrance


Here is the story of the last few days of the pregnancy and the birth!

Our last hypnobirthing story was Thursday and it was exciting to meet someone who had successfully used the hypnosis to birth, it truly was. But on the same token I feared that with my mother here as much as I love her, that she would not understand and know enough to be able to support this method. Neil and I had not practiced enough hypnobirthing either, so it was going to be a shot in the dark really if the methods were going to work for us all. My mom flew in Friday night from West Palm Beach, and I was so thankful to see her!

How it started:

Saturday morning 4 am I had my first contraction. I was not sure it was for real, and I figured it was all in my head. I knew I just wanted labor to get started so I figured that every twinge I got I would probably would want to think... "this is it".

So it's now Saturday 10 October - 5 am. I get up to pee - again - and I think it's another contraction but it's not very painful, but it aches a little more than they have in days previous... but still not sure, I go back to bed.

It's 7 am. More peeing, some water starts to leak out of me. I figure this is round two of Monday's false alarm. I tell Neil maybe it's here.. water comes gushing out, I sit on the edge of the bath tub, and water starts coming out a lot... gush once, gush twice, thrice, ok... now we are pretty sure it's my water and it has broken. I must be one of those 8% of cases that water breaks prior to labor starting. Ok shower time! Called the hospital and it was neat to tell them that it was actually my due date! (5% of women go into labor and have their baby on the due date)

So we get cleaned up, get all our stuff and go get some breakfast. We went to Metro Diner on the way there and I had a couple blueberry pancakes, but the contractions were coming, even if they were not painful yet. Go to hospital in Bethesda... the President's hospital!

At Bethesda Naval Medical Center (Hospital):

I was triaged, 4 cm dilated. The baby's heart was monitored as well as my uterine contractions and they also did a quick ultrasound to ensure the baby's head was down. The nurse started an IV when I told them my water broke. I was not leaving the hospital without having this little man! (One the nurses blew out a vein in my arm.. very very bruised still!) But the second 18G needle that went in was set no problem. Did I tell you how lucky I was to poop while we were waiting to be triaged?? Lucky huh?

So about 1130 we were moved to a labor and delivery room (looked like a suite at your local Motel 8 rooms). There was a couch, a rocking chair, a bed for me that had a pull away section, shower, birthing ball... eh.. all good. But here's the thing that drove me nuts... I had to be on the monitor constantly, and I didn't realize the importance until the nurses and doctors kept rushing into the room with urgency and sense of purpose.

I had to be on the monitor all the time! So every time I had to pee, I had to let them know. When I sat on the birthing ball, they couldn't see the monitor.. it just wouldn't work while I was sitting that "way". So that was a pain. I wanted to stand but that was problematic as well. The surges kept coming and I was very comfortable for a while. I started listening to my hypnobirthing recordings a bit too late I think... that and well no one knew about it and my mom just kept telling me about the pain I was about to experience. The unfortunate thing was that the word "pain" was supposed to be off limits! We were not supposed to talk about it, but she did not realize that. My birth plan included that, as well as having the baby be put onto my chest if all goes well. OH well... Mom and Neil went to get some lunch in the cafe of the hospital.

After they returned labor was still moderate and I was easily able to deal with it. Some of the surges really started kicking up around 4 pm and I had to really focus on hypnobirthing. But still, I had distractions that were inevitable. I decided not to call the doula or Crystalene, I wanted privacy... and I didn't realize that I would feel like that, but I was off my birth plan already and I was a bit embarrassed in a sense. I was not doing everything I was supposed to be doing in order to be in the deepest most relaxed state I could be in. Oh well... poop. Oddly enough though looking back I don't remember how it all really went except for the very end. Time flew by and between some of the more serious surges, I was able to sleep and be in a hypnotic state, I listened to my ipod over and over.. the 1812 Overture was a blessing and made me feel perfectly content. I was zoning out... my mother' and husband's presence was comforting but I barely remember them there in some instances. Mom and Neil held my legs up too once I was moved to the bed. I barely remember but it felt so good, and I think I was telling them over and over how good it felt and how great the music was, I think I told my mom and Neil repeatedly. I also barely remember the talking... mom and Neil would be talking but it felt like their conversation was so far away and not in the room. It was awesome in hind sight. I remember the back pain I had too, and how I held the sides of the bed and held myself up for all of my surges. I remember the unbelievable desire to poop for so long and how badly I wanted it to go away. I had wished I could have pooped!

Around what I think was 10 pm I was 8 cm dilated. The anesthesiologist came by and between some erratic contractions (2 mins apart) she read to me the options I had for pain relief and what would happen if there was an emergency and/or c-section. I had to sign that I understood my options.. that was fun...

So I moved towards 9 cm pretty quick but I hung there for a while. One of the doctors kept saying how if I didn't progress they wanted to go to use Pitocin to completely dilate and regulate contractions. I am so glad I stood my ground and told them no. My cervix softened on it's own and to the point that my nurse was certain I was to be able to push through (thank goodness for the nurse - Margaret - she was a blessing).

Pushing and Delivery:

So I was allowed to push - I felt like I could see the finish line! It felt good to push, my contractions were manageable again! It was a warm feeling and I could feel the sensation as his head traversed the birth canal.

The nurse tried to empty my bladder by inserting a catheter into my urethra and that was painful and miserable! Not only that but no pee came out, it was too late basically and all that was successfully done is worsened my post deliver urinary incontinence (I barely made it to the bathroom a couple times during our hospital stay. . . ok, I will level with you, I made it to the bathroom - dropped trow and realized I had already peed on my feet and the floor just before making over the toilet!)

The room was ready in minutes. Absorbent paper was put on the ground and a bag was attached to the bed by my hiney. They poured some stuff onto me iodine or whatever... and i remember how cold it was. Brrr... but it also felt good, guess they had to clean the area up! The doc continued to stretch out my perineum to make it easier I suppose. They dropped the head of my bed a bit so I was leaning back a bit further. The doctors explained to me to grab my legs, push with my abs, and to breath in and hold for 10 during pushing. I did this three times each contraction that came on.

It felt so good to push! We pushed for about an hour or so maybe? Time was so skewed for me. Looking back the pain does not seem so bad, but I also remember looking into Neil's eyes and whispering that it would never be over and how I felt I may not be able to do it. His presence was all I needed.

Mom and Neil told me that they were holding my bum so that the hemorrhoids would not fall out!!! I never realized it.

He's Out! But I am still laying here....

So they take him out, pulling and pushing, there was urgency. He had the cord wrapped around his neck twice. I did not realize it and I just relished in the warm feeling of his exit and the fact that he was in good hands. I saw the female doctor cut his cord, I realized then that something was up, but they moved so quickly and the baby was moving quickly. I trusted them to do what they do best, the female doc that delivered us made me feel at ease, I had seen her a few times over the last few hours. She had an air of confidence and aptitude. She was good at what she did, or at least she had wonderful bed side manners.

I heard Gustave peep... he was not too loud but he was fine. The pediatricians appeared quickly and reported to us that he was fine and they would come by tomorrow to check on him. So he got a little extra attention, not a bad thing. They gave him his vitamin K shot, he didn't say a word. Neil was right there when he was on the warming table. The Corpman did their jobs well.

I was still on the table, one of the newer residents was at the ready holding the umbilical cord where it was still attached to the placenta which was still inside. They were waiting for it to come out. I was given Pitocin to facilitate the dropping of the placenta and shrinking of the uterus. I didn't feel much and then all of a sudden the female doc took over and showed the newer doc how to do it. She gave it a bit of a tug gave my abdomen a really good massage and out it came. No pain really. She put the placenta into a blue rubbermaid bin and inspected it.

Now came clean up. Doc rolled up her chair to inspect my underthings. I was joking with the doctors at this point, we were laughing together, she admired my strength to labor without an epi, I admired her professionalism. I was feeling pretty high on life I suppose that and I was exhausted and sweaty from all the pushing. She found a small tear and got the lidocaine out and injected me in with it to numb me up. That pinched a bit here and there, but then nothing, she gave me three stitches and all done!

Neil brought me my little man, I had been watching him from the bed the whole time while the doctors worked on me. I was so happy.. he was so little, I felt so inept! I just had never held a newborn. The nurse helped me get him to breast feed a little. She helped me put him in the football hold and then in a cross the chest hold. She was so patient. People had filtered out of the room, it was just us and the nurse.

A corpsman came by and gave him a sponge bath, and he got hepatitis B shot and he was given back to Neil. I was so tired. The nurse wanted me to pee prior to leaving the room to our newer cleaner recovery suite. Then we took the walk to suite 8 and settled in. Mom went to stay at the Navy Lodge on post (it was three AM!) and Neil went to get our bags. We brushed, baby was in the bassinet that they provided and he was checked on a few times as was I. Neil slept on the pull out couch that was provided. We kinda slept... everything is so fuzzy looking back!

Ok well you will have to read part II for more!



Friday, October 9, 2009

Tomorrow's EDD!

Whoa, who's that in the reflection???

It's Friday and its the day before our due date and I am home relaxing. I have more or less have been told not to come to to work! H1N1 Flu is going around and there is a scare, but I am missing having a purpose that I am accustomed to.

I decided to get moving early enough to get a cup of coffee at City Dock before the Sailboat show rush in Annapolis (Big boat show!). Everyone was super friendly this morning, lots of good mornings! It was so pleasant. I grabbed the camera and got my white chocolate mocha decaf and a gingerbread muffin that was deee-lish! I sat down, ate, and then took a stroll up Main Street. It was nice and cool out and lots of people getting the day started. It was lovely.

While taking my walk and checking out the windows and the goodies behind the windows, I saw my reflection and its so tough to accept the reflection. I don't totally feel the way I look (well there are moments - like when I can't get off the couch). I had to snap the picture you see above! My belly sticks out so far! I got a couple comments today, and it's fun to say... "well, my due date is tomorrow actually!".

SO for those that don't know, Monday night we had a bit practice run. I went to lunch with Neil and I had a gush of fluid come down while I was on the toilet. It was a bit strange because it was a lot of fluid but not enough to really be my water breaking. But we had read that it can come down a little here and a little there. I kept flowing the rest of the day, so we called Labor and Delivery at Bethesda Naval Hospital and they told us to eat, shower and come in. So we did, we took our time and got there around 2100 and they put me on a monitor and did an internal check. The monitor was neat, but for 30 minutes I had to sit tight, and Gustave kicked the monitor the entire time! It was super cute! Neil was pretty much asleep during the triage, but he did help me get the super complicated gown on, too many snaps!

So the baby was good, but upon checking the fluids, they said that they were not amniotic fluid so they sent us home. So that was good.... it was good to time the trip in the evening and give a practice run... although Neil took us a bit quicker than expected. We made it in 40 minutes! Got some McDonalds afterward since Neil had missed dinner. I nibbled on fries.. mmm.. So we were home in bed by midnight.

So beyond that, just waiting for labor to get going! I suppose I could try some spicy food... did some walking this morning. Hot showers. Eh... we will see I suppose. We are 2 cm dilated 50% effaced, blood pressure is still good (120/70 - higher than previous) - and the doc keeps telling Neil to do "his part" to help get the cervix soft, he giggled. But all is good! Head was down, I hope he stays that way! I keep doing the exercises.

I will be happy when the heart burn is gone! It's terrible! I just am so surprised it's still so bad.

We, Or I guess I had our last Hypnobirthing class last night. I went without Neil so he could finish the tile work in the spare bathroom... but unfortunately not done yet. Maybe today? SO I am hoping that gets done, but Mom will be here tonight so guess she will be sharing our crappy bathroom for a day or so. Maybe I will take mom to the Boat Show or the Green show in D.C.

I just am getting so impatient! I feel so heavy - 167 lbs at my Wednesday visit, ugh. We have another doc's appt next week, but I hope we don't make it to then! I hope!!!!

OK, well enough about baby! Saw a preying mantis when I got home and then took a nap! Hmm... nap! Nice. I guess I needed it cause I slept for 2 hours! OK, time to get the baby room and Halloween decorations going!




Saturday, October 3, 2009

1 Week Left to EDD


Yeah we are almost there! I am not sure I could be more uncomfortable at this point! Having this belly is a lot of work and it always seems in the way!

Last week the doctor confirmed 1 cm dilated/20% effaced, so things are moving along as anticipated. This has been such a normal run of the mill pregnancy, I can only hope his birth day will be as "normal" as well! I just can't wait. Every little ache and braxton hicks contraction I keep wondering is this it, is he coming? Last night I had three pretty good braxton hicks but nothing... I just got up to use the head and went back to sleep ((sigh)).

Tonight is the full moon though and they say that there is an increased possibility that your waters can break because of the gravitational pull... but we don't have major tides here so I think Gustave will probably dictate when he comes out! He's the boss now!

Friday at work, omg my colleagues all surprised me good! My Navy division decided to send one of my guys over to me with a "problem" and that I had to meet him at noon. When he came by basically we searched for a place to talk and when we got to the small conference room everyone was there! They had gotten me a cake and some lovely organic gifts for the little man! It was so cute! We sat and enjoyed one another's company over cake! I just was floored, they got us some really sweet things and it was just over the top!!! I am so happy!

But it doesn't end there. Just when I thought the people hated me so and told me I have a manning meeting to go to on Friday 1300... I open the door to the other conference room to find cake and flower and more gifts! I couldn't believe it... (I really didn't think the staff where I work cared for me that much). But it was super sweet... it seemed a little forced which made me uncomfortable, but I felt myself blushing as I walked in. SO had more cake with some lovely folk and got some beautiful clothes - hand knits, the cutest gap outfit ever and a couple Winnie the Pooh outfits sooooo cute! Flowers ... adorning my kitchen.. it's amazing how nice people really can be... when you are pregnant! Haha... it seems there is extra special attention given to pregos... but hey.. here at the end of it all... I know why now... it's tough getting around, coming to work and putting in the long hours wrapping up everything. I have been working 10 hour days trying to just get everything turned over!!! I am a work-a-holic... that's what I have decided.

Think I might go for a walk this morning.. I was waiting for Neil to get up in case he wanted to join me, but oh well... I try to let him sleep in when he can, since he continues to remind me how much he will miss the sleeping when Gustave comes.

So I was going to put a picture of my belly button up... but... upon seeing the photo... I don't think so... it was much cuter in the mirror than in a close up photo! So I will spare you! It's kinda star shaped but not that pretty! Enjoy the week! Next post will hopefully be about a birth day... if not, oh well!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

It's 3 a,m. and I can't sleep....

What gives... I can't sleep... woke up around 0130 and had to tinkle... and now nothing. I started thinking about work, evals, how did mine bomb... I didn't realize I would be picked and pulled apart... a part of me just didn't want to hear it and was butt hurt by it... my self-sabotaging self wondered how I had gone so wrong, first to the Sailor and second the the Chief who's there representing us... I steered him wrong and this is what is keeping me up... I failed people... a few... I should have kept my mouth shut and stayed at work.

OK no more debbie downer stuff... I could get stuck here for days... and I will no doubt linger on it for a while... I would call the Chief and apologize if it wasn't stupid dark thirty.

Things eat at me. Things never bother Neil... I wish I could be more like him sometimes. Is it confidence? Is it just his maleness or is he really sensitive in there but just doesn't let anyone else see it. sigh... then there is me... over sensitive... and it sucks... and I know it. It's a weakness... I wonder if there is a self-hypnosis tape for that. I have been practicing my hypnobirthing but I feel like I keep falling asleep, I feel calmer lately but I hope I am getting something out of it. Neil hasn't been reading me the scripts, so it's the one hypnosis suggestion that is going to have to work if this baby comes soon.. we will see I suppose.

I go to the doctor today at 0730 and he is going to do an exam, so we will see if I am dialated. If I am he said he would strip my membranes... so we will see more later.

Oh also I am on the web! http://www.crystalooneys.com/gallerybellyandbodypainting.html

Ok why did I think of that.. because today at about the same time I got two missed calls. One from Mom saying she was having sympathy cramping (she is postmenopause so there is no reason she should be having any contractions) and then Crystalene called me too saying she was thinking of me all day. Wild huh? And this evening I have a bought of severe nesting and I have been cramping all day. I suppose we are almost there! I have had back aches, I can't get comfortable, I can't get rid of this indigestion though either... and who knows if the evals are really what's keeping me up or what...

Sigh.. I am going to turn the tube on and get off the internet before I waste my whole night here... sigh... night night...

Saturday, September 26, 2009

In the birthing window but, what is this goo?

We are finally in the "window", home stretch... and our baby is safe to be born now! Doc says it could be any day and I am sooooo excited! I just can't wait to meet him!!! He moves so much and he is so big, or at least my belly is so big and severely uncomfortable at this point! Next week the doc is going to get a visual to see where we are at...

This is going to be TMI but sit tight... My body has been letting down some "goo", it's kinda jello'y, but clear. I suppose it's only more "getting ready" stuff that the body does, still strange. Let's see.. other signs... I have been nesting... I have had a couple crampy contractions, and I have been more emotional, or at least that's what Neil would say... it's cause I am asking him to do more I suppose...

The weather is cooling off and it's an absolute blessing as I am still very warm most times - Neil still struggles at night to keep the blankets on him. I sleep without covers, just a lot of pillows!! Last night some contractions were waking me though, they are only Braxton Hicks but it's practice for the real thing!!! Can't wait! I have to keep practicing my hypnobirthing though, I have not been the best about listening to my affirmations and hypnosis CD. I think I will do that today while I finish up laundry.

The Nursery is done, thanks to friends and a little motivation! Thank goodness for the good people in my life! I couldn't be more grateful! It's a cute room, has all the basics just need to decorate it a bit more tomorrow.

So as for my energy level, I am sooo much more tired. I get out of bed, I go to work and by the time I am driving in or riding with Neil, I am toast and ready for another nap. I am so exhausted! I am ready for a nap before I even get to work. Last week I tried to scramble to get everything done but as that goes, there is still more to be done before I go. Hopefully this week I can through it but if not, well someone else will handle it... we are interchangeable!




Saturday I went (Neil dropped me off) to the Quiet Waters Art and Music Festival and Crystalene (of www.crystalooneys.com) painted my belly! She's also the one that did the henna on my tummy last week too! She is awesome, we met in Hypnobirthing class! She is Australian and the painting this week was for some music that was playing that involved a dirigido.

I think some apple muffins are in order... with the changing season and all time to celebrate the harvest!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Another wall goes down and little man heads south at 37!

We got some serious help Saturday from some seriously amazing people! Thank you Whitney, Derek and Ian for coming out. I am just so happy and so in awe of how kind you guys are. You gave us two new rooms this week and just about assembled our Ikea baby room!

We would have never been able to move that Armoire/Wardrobe with out the help of the boys! (we even had to cut a wall to get it out of the house!)

I must say our adventure to Ikea was a bit nutty... some guy in a Cadillac tried to run us off the road.. scary stuff. But had a wonderful Ihop breakfast too... seems like no trip is ever uneventful!

SO not only has the weekend turned out to be so great, but this past week we also participated in our annual induction of new Chiefs - a 24+ hour event that starts one morning and ends the next day/afternoon. It was wild and I am glad because this year we got a room on post and I was able to go get some rest. It was the only way I was going to make it through the night. This body as strong as it is, is exhausted easily and I am proud to report I lasted pretty good, even though I did not play any major roles, I just took a lot of pictures all night! I guess that is a helpful thing too! So now we have 30+ new Chiefs, I have very swollen tired feet, and I am very proud! Although some folks lost money as they were taking bets that I would go into labor that night... nope! All good! Just a few practice surges/contractions.

Hypnobirthing Class #2: Our instructor put us "out" for about 40 minutes Thursday night! I couldn't believe it though because all eight couples reported it felt like 10 minutes. Class is every Thursday 1830-2100, makes for a long day but it's so interesting. The idea is that you train your self to get into a hypnotic state and let your body do all the work! We are only animals... we should be able to birth like them! I just hope it all works out during the birth and that it's uneventful!

As we get closer I get a bit more and more worried but so excited at the same time. I ask myself.. what will it feel like? Will I be able to walk around? Will it be one of those 25 hour labors that you hear about? Will I endure the pain? Will he come out healthy? All those things are running around my head... or even if we are "ready enough" at home! I am just in awe that something so natural and so simple can be such a huge undertaking and life changing event. We have been doing it since the beginning of time and evolution!

Little man moves south! Either he's feeling the changing weather outside (I am wearing jogging pants for the first time this season!) or he's getting into position! I feel that I can breath easier now and indigestion frequency seems to be on the decline! Thank goodness... Pizza is about the only thing that really is causing me any problems.. so I will have to forgo it till he arrives! Little man is also been a bit of a mover lately. He is so very entertaining and I think I will miss all his movements. Now let me caveat that though... I am the slowest moving person on the planet too... I feel like I have become a sloth! I am still trying to work out at the gym a few days a week but man I am just sloooowwww... I have random spurts of energy but I suppose where the little guy decided to nestle is making it very difficult to move about. I even tried to help put the crib together last night... and I must say rolling around the floor... not an 8 and a half month pregnant lady's forte. I think I will let Neil finish that up!

That's this week in a nutshell! I just can't wait for our little man to arrive! Neil can't wait to dress him in collared shirts! ;)

Friday, September 18, 2009

"He's your Alisha"

CAVEAT: To Alisha, I love you honey and mean you no offense. I live vicariously through you!! I miss you and love you to pieces and don't see my life without you woman!

Story: Neil has a friend who is more drama than all my drama friends combined. I mean Alisha and I have had our falling out and falling back ins... but it's like a sisterhood. There is little that would ever ruin us! And now I watch Neil and his bud just falling apart and the silly drama that revolves around this guy. For Neil, who has no drama in his life and is such a simple guy full of sarcasm, it's funny his friend is so overly sensitive etc... it's like an opposites attract thing... so the other day told Neil.... He's your Alisha, but worse! LOL! OK anyways.... I thought it was funny.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Getting closer!!!

This week was interesting... it was so busy! It was soo so busy I have not had the time to write my blog!!!

The magic in my life seems so far away right now. I remember growing up and my grandmother had a "magic wand" (a twig with glitter and a satin ribbon for a handle), and every full moon the elves (in Spanish "enanos") would "come out" and we would have a chant in French that we would have to say... Something like "Petite baguete sukuto se fe..?", something to the extent, "little stick, little stick take me ....". Ok so my nanna, my mom, and my grandmother would be there with me and my two brothers and we were so little... and the stick would be in our hand being held by grandmother's or mom's hand... and the wand would start "shaking" and it would start pointing in a direction and seemingly pull. A few steps away all of a sudden there was sometimes a light, there was sometimes a little bag, but there was a little gift from the elves. It was always something small... a matchbox car, or a small dollie... but it was so neat. My mom or grandmother would say, "look there goes one now" and sure enough we would "see" them! They gave us the means to have such a wild imagination that we used to see them! Just like Santa Claus... we used to see him too and his reindeer! There was magic in our childhood. And I don't know, but throughout my life I have always had some sort of magic in it. Here lately I feel that it has slipped away from me, but at the same time I am so very much prepared to engage my little one's mind with all the wonders of the world! I can't wait to share this world with him!

Everyone just seems to be living in such a "plastic" world... material goods, credit cards, bigger, better... nothing can be simple. It seems no one is happy with anything they have, everyone needs more, everyone needs a better job, a better home... well ok there is a few people that don't live like that... but sigh.. I wish I could live simpler, but well, it's what comes with it all, life, this life, life in the "fast lane". Keeping us busy constantly! But granted we have all the bells and whistles anyone can ask for in a life. But I can't help but think of what's important in life and I feel that I am about to know for myself. This little man is about to change my life, give us both greater purpose! So much ahead!

So we started our birthing classes! Finally! We are going the Hypnobirthing method. It's a self hypnosis method to help you deal with the discomfort of labor. In fact they say there is no reason for the pain since it's only muscles tensing and releasing during contractions. They equate the pain that most women feel to the anxiety and tension that most women experience. I guess we will see... I have seen a lot of videos of hypnobirthing (just look at www.youtube.com and search hypnobirthing - there is a great dateline video that explains it).

We also started packing the bag for the hospital so we are prepared! Next week we will start carrying it in the car I suppose just to be ready! So much to pack!!!
clothes for me
clothes for baby
wipes for everyone
socks, shoes etc
toiletries
magazines
sanitary napkins
towels for the car to keep the seats clean
plastic bags (same as above)
birth plan
cell phone
camera
sooo much!!!

On one totally different note had another fox sighting this past week! So neat to see all the animals here. As it's getting cooler the air is crisper and so beautiful here!

Monday, September 7, 2009

Strange dreams and water puffiness...

Went for a walk this morning, what a great morning, it's overcast but beautiful, breezy and the osprey were out hunting - I even saw one with a fish flapping in his claws. But by the time I got back I noticed my hands were puffy... so got home jumped on my Wii to see what the weight change was... 3 pounds in a week... I am thinking water weight... ok I am hoping that's what it is. Very discouraging to see! I have not gained weight like that this entire time... and all of a sudden... poof. Feels like this little guy has very little room to move around lately but he finds a way to squirm plenty!

The breeze is finally truly cooling off - it has to be just under 70 degrees - I opened up allt he windows this morning, the cats are loving it! They are going nuts, it's like they are getting high off the outdoor smells.

So I have been having some strange dreams lately, and they are so very vivid. Last night I dreamed that I was bleeding and had to drive to the hospital on my own... woke me up, and then the night before I had a few interesting couple dreams too. In the first one I was working for the government (not a far stretch) and I was in a strange city - big city - but not one I recognized. I dressed very drab and I had a hat on. But at some point some radical political cult took over the work place, guns, threats etc. And there was much confusion. So much confusion that a group of us got into a formation and walked right out of the building and slowly but surely made it back to our living quarters. Myself and a roommate or neighbor went to our apartment and talked about leaving and packing up a few things and leaving town. At this point I think I woke up.

Another dream last night was more local. I was outside the house, it was overcast and kinda dark, I think I was getting the mail from our mailbox. But all of a sudden, and in slow motion, a big kitty emerged from the brush across the street. It was strange though because I remember it happening so slowly that I was able to consider if it was a lion or a cougar or what before it was upon me. Not sure what happened after that.

Interesting how the mind works. All sorts of strange stuff. Oh and I have been pregnant in most of my dreams except for the one in which I was workign for the government.

Ok so today I am going to work on packing my hospital bag and getting everything I should need if little man shows up early.. and then going to pick up Neil from his mini vaca. I also need tiles.. hmm... more tiles so that we can finish that bathroom, or at this point hire someone to finish that bathroom already. This house needs to be worked!!! ;)

OK off to start my day!

Saturday, September 5, 2009

35 Weeks - and no nursery yet!


We are cutting it close alright!! I would have liked our house to be further along but it's not. We are still pending the completion of the third room in order to move forward with the little man's room. The floor has been a hang up because of the time it takes to put it together. One person, Neil, working alone just makes it so time consuming. We once had friends that would help but that kinda went by the way side.

No negative stuff here... moving forward! Heartburn has been pretty bad lately, brownies are a major offender! SO looks like I will not be eating those much more. . . Neil will be happy to hear that.. more for him! ;) The heartburn has been vicious too! It's not your mild case of indigestion, it's an all out assault on my esophagus! The burn I get is intolerable, and many times there seems so little I can do. I take some Rolaids, but I can't take anything for indigestion if when I take my iron pill... so that causes a damper. So basically I have to suffer... for a little while longer.

My ankles and hips are "looser" than ever and seems that I roll my ankles more and feels funny more often.

My nesting task for today was washing baby clothes! It's so exciting, and I couldn't believe that it took so long to cut all the tags off! I think we have enough clothes to get us started, at least I hope so. I don't know what's enough!! I guess we will see. I also started putting my over night/hospital bag together. I bought some small toiletries, warm socks, baby book, pens, but I guess I have to put a list together so I will not forget anything. I can't find my travel scrabble either... I didn't think it was far... and then there is the ipod, but I use that a lot so I can't just pack it away yet. So you see it's a bit of a challenge. Not only that but if I go into labor and am away from the house that would make Neil have to come back to Annapolis to come get our stuff... Maybe if it gets cooler soon we will be able to keep everything in the car, but it still seems too warm to just leave certain things in the car... ok that was a boring ramble.

So Little Man has been moving a lot! He is strong and I can feel his bottom and shoulders or knees and it's wild. He has been frequenting the top of my uterus and I suppose that's why I get such horrible heartburn.

I have also gotten my first couple of practice contractions! The night before Neil left for his family trip I had my first contraction... OK it was 3 am in the morning, but it was interesting. My tummy got really hard, after the hot shower it all subsided though. Neil's flight was at 0530 so it worked out fine. I wonder if it was stress related?

So five weeks left if he comes on time! I just can't believe it! The time has gone by so fast! But I am so tired lately! I just don't feel like doing much lately... in the morning is the only time I have "umph" and by 1300/1400 I am about done, tired!

I keep wondering what it will all be like, what will it be like to feel him? I can't wait!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

What's in a name?

Ok I had to bend over to see my toes.. but they look so far way!


I am surprised at how difficult it has been thinking about a name.

The only thing that seems solid for us is Gustave. Neil's Grandfather was Gustave and so was a great grandfather of ours. It's perfect and it goes so well as Gustave Rubin. But now what about a middle name? I ran across Cain... but I also liked a few other names for him... Sebastian or Rafael.. which oddly enough my cousins have named their little men.

How I can't wait for this little mini me to appear! He moves a lot in my belly lately and I got my first kick to the rib this morning! Heart burn is a normal way of life too, I suppose when I eat the muscles are so loose and he's so mobile that it's just a bad combination. There are days the antacids or even my prescription zantac don't help.

My joints are popping a lot more on the simple movements as of late. When I haul myself out of bed, when I pick myself up off the couch, just walking around my joints are just not what they were a few months ago. Again I suppose this is another one of the subtle indicators that someone's birthday is coming soon! I am finding it more and more difficult to get up (from bed, couch). I feel like a turtle stuck on her back... Neil occasionally will try to help me up, pushes me out of bed or gives me a hand off the couch.. it's amusing.

My feet are also taking a beating! They seem tender each day! Putting them up on the coffee table at the end of the day has been helpful, it does relieve some of the pains, but it's funny to have these "typical" pains... it's wild how different each pregnancy can be but how similar they are too. www.babycenter.com has been a life saver answering all the little questions.

We also started reading my textbook for hypnobirthing classes, ok I started reading the book... I give Neil the highlights. We start class 10 Sept which is a little later than we wanted but it was the only class we could get into. I am hoping for a drug free labor, but we will see when we get there. I am no opposed to the epidural, but I would rather allow my body to do as much of it as it can naturally (I can hear many moms laughing... that's ok). Bethesda says they will give you the epi no matter how far along you are in labor. The biggest thing I do not like about the epi is no walking around! :(

So what other funnies for the week... I look like i am smuggling a watermelon in my uniform, I will have to take a picture next week. Most of my maternity shirts are really pushing the limits. I feel very ROUND, this belly sticks out significantly and there is still more to come!!!

I also have developed a small shadow of a linea nigra, a dark line going straight down my belly. They say it goes from your belly button down but mine is above the belly button... my tattoo hides below my belly button. So far it's a cute faint line... badge of honor! (You can barely see it, and upon taking pics, i realized that it runs all the way up and down!)


He moves so much it's wonderful. He keeps me company all day!


6 Weeks to go!