My blog is moved!

My blog is moving, Neil has very graciously given me a new site and MY OWN DOT COM!!! Yeah!

Please visit me at www.oceancupcake.com!

I am still working bugs out and changing the way it looks.

5 months and 1+ week

Gus grows with each week... this past week he learned a few new tricks which just adds to his adorability factor 10 fold... maybe 20 fold.

He grabs his toes and thinks they are the greatest thing
and he also goes "brrrrrfsffffsss" when he purses his lips and blows
(especially when there is a nice spoon of rice cereal there-
which makes it especially fun!~)

Motherhood continues to amaze me! He is just such a blessing, I don't know why we waited so long to have kids! For those parents of teens and young adults out there, don't forget to encourage your younger ones to procreate! I focused too long on "I want to go to college" and "I want to start a life" and "I want to be so independent" and "my career comes first"... I had put aside the marriage and have kids ideas for too long. I was so selfish! But on the other hand, don't make too many - we do have an overpopulation issue! One per adult!

Neil and I believe that couple should only have two kids.. just enough to replace them. I agree! Babies are wonderful and all, as are big families, but I just don't see the point if overpopulation will destroy the earth we live on, and that they inherit.

Gus is such a happy baby, but he had a few random crying bouts yesterday that were a bit off. We think he might start teething soon, or maybe he just was full of poo... which he did let go finally during some some encouraging tummy time.

Enjoy the pics! We took Gus swimming last week, he loved it! Just playing in the water (warm water - therapy pool at the Severna SPY). I actually even wore a bikini... umm... never again... or at least for a while.. my jiggle is still ewwww...

As for little nekked man... sooo cute... can't help but take a few cuties!

Ok more to come soon!

Rice mush.

Rice Cereal. How exciting, we got the go ahead on our 4 month doctors appt and now we are getting used to the idea. Gus is taking his mush in pretty well all in all. He actually opens his mouth and the thicker I have made it still is working out well for him. He is so funny though and the last two nights (without Neil's help) it's been very very messy!!! UGH!!

Ebay Junkie. Have you ever used Ebay like a garage sale? It's my new hobby to get rid of stuff... as in selling stuff we don't need any more and getting mooola back! It's a sweet deal! (money goes right into my paypal account).

Mommy Sanity. Went for a stroll with Christalene and the babies the other day and it was wonderful. The weather was glorious!! We picked up lunch at respective restaurants (we wanted different lunch stuffs) and went to the "city dock" to eat (just by ego ally in Annapolis proper). We enjoyed our meals, we fed the boys (tried to be discrete but well.. boobs on the dock works too). And then we had to have desert, but not one, I had three... Christalene had two. I had cookies with my sandwich (from Atwaters), I had a crepe from the little crepe joint (banana royale), and it was soo good... I dropped it twice on the dirty dirty road way and still ate it. The butterscotch (which was home made) was so gooey and so tasty, and so all over the place! It was too good! Then later we walked from Christalene's house to Ritas which just opened for the season! Soooo good! Walk up and got my junior cup of custard... with sprinkles!!! YUM!!!

Ok more later, I have so much to chat up about but ugh.

Day care said that Gus held his bottle on his own terms today! First for everything!

boobs@work.com

(we have this ad on our wall in the "mommy room")

My hair is falling out

My boobs are floppy, I could hold many markers
(before I could barely hold a pencil)

There is a crease under my cheeks
(and not the ones on my face)

I have to specially dry that crease after the shower

Every 2 hrs (at work) I wrangle plastic tubes, bottles, and go topless!

Estrogen dumping makes me moodier

Jeans still don't fit, I hate my uniform

So there we were talking about how our bodies take on such great changes in shape, chemistry and even allergies. As if it's not bad enough we can't be with our little angels all day long we have to revel in all the changes he or she brought us in a little closet of a room with our machines (brrmmm brrmmmm suck brmmm brrmmm suck as they go).

Laughing after she told me this, but one of the gals I pump with, she had a new allergy start up last week. She gets hives. And today she didn't come in to work earlier because she claimed she had "marge simpson" lips. Poor thing, she has a new allergy that she can't figure out. I told her to tell everyone she got botox. Then I imagined the scene and laughed the rest of the day, bless her heart.

As for clothing, at least all the civilian moms get to wear comfy clothes, in order to pump at work, I have to assemble parts, connect tubes, prepare some paper towels for the milk that drips everywhere, unzip my jacket (because I refuse to let people see me without it - too fatty fat), unbutton my blouse without my ribbons ripping skin off my hands and arms, pull up my undershirt, hope my belt buckle doesn't fall off (because they are not made well) and cross fingers to not get milk on anything while holding these two suction cups to my bare breasts, and I still get milk on my shirt and pants. Just when you get comfy someone else walks in (another mom) and I always feel a slight awkwardness and the need to turn a little away because the room is super small and you feel like you are in each others laps where you might as well be comparing nipple color. Sigh.. funny stuff. The things we do. I love my little Gustave.

Speaking of, he got 4 shots today. Saw a couple tears (we never see him shed a tear). He is about 4 and a half months old. He weights just at 20 lbs, he is 27.5 inches long and his head circumfrence is 16.5 inches. Doc said something like 98 percentile for his height and weight so I guess that is good good.

What happened to 5 years ago?

What a week! Gus is half way to his 5 months! Whoho! We have shots next week and he has been doing more tummy time and rolling around these days.

He grows like a week! I am in shock how long he has gotten in the last couple weeks. At daycare today he had two major blow outs so the lovely ladies had to change his outfits. The outfits they had as back ups were a bit too small! He has outgrown them, so he came home in this short sleeved pants falling off cowboy outfit.. sigh... mom has to provide day care some bigger back up clothes!

So 5 years ago I would have never guessed this is where I would be in my life. In fact let's see.. 2005, I was leaving San Diego, I had made Chief Petty Officer, Neil proposed to me, I was a partier, I was enjoying life to the max, I snowboarded religiously during the winters, and I was transferred to Texas. I had a click... we had friends. I had a going away dinner, I miss them, I miss OB, I miss having people. I never would have thought I would be bearing my breasts in front of other women in a small room at such an exclusive agency three times a day (Mommy room at work), I never thought I would be in a "fixer upper" that we are still renovating a year and a half later (what were we thinking, never again), I didn't think my life would change so dramatically... but it did. It's unrecognizable, my people got to busy with their own lives, and we moved away.. it happens. Oh it happens!

Here I don't have people.. yet. But instead of standing by as I did in Texas I started a meetup.com group. We will see how it goes, I have 15 mommies! Yeah! I am excited to make some new friends at similar points in life!

Now Gus is the highlight of my life, but I want to share him! Men are so different about it, I hope to share some adult conversation that doesn't revolve around work or babies (or at least all the time). I have not had a conversation in such a long time, I just don't know what I would say, I probably would revert to talk of babies! Haha..

Sigh, remember the past, enjoy the moment, and look forward to the future! I suppose I need that as a new mantra! I just feel like it's going by too fast! And we are not enjoying it with the people we love the most. Today, go remind someone you love them, and why they are such a big part of your life. . . because before you know it, it's five years later and you haven't spoken in months and maybe years!

How many toys do you buy?

Gustave is Mr. Independent these days. He is playing more and more on his own without having to be bothered with others. His mirror and himself laugh and play, its adorable. It's neat to see the transition as he begins to interact with the world around him, it's amazing!

As for his interaction, we have purchased him more than his fair share of little toys. He has things that ding, sing, dong, rattle, roll, talk, spell his name for him, tell him the colors in Spanish, soft things, chewy things, things that wrachet, and the list seems to go on! We love getting him things! He seems to have quiet a few favorites.. and they are usually the ones he can grasp. The ball in the picture above (Baby Einstein), and a crinkly lion (Bright Start). He seems to really love those to in particular because he can get them to his mouth. Everything goes in his mouth! He is even putting fingers in his mouth these days. About a week ago only the back of his fist would make it, but now fingers.. we will see where that goes, I suppose it will morph into thumb sucking... just so cute. He sucks on everything... Neil's arm, my belly when I am getting ready, fingers, hands, knuckles.. it's so cute. I suppose some of it is soothing. \

So how many toys are too much.. well we said two days ago that we would not over do it on the toys and then I go ahead and spend $50 in toys yesterday (baby laptop, Leap Frog's Scout, and I don't even know what.. but it must have been cute and useful). I think Gus likes the diversity and we can figure out what he likes best too.

He has also been working those vocal cords out. He will yell, gurgle, squeal (seems to be his favorite) and expects you to talk to him. he will look on to see what you will do next. So I give him conversation.. baby conversation, and even laughing, Neil and I can get him laughing by laughing at him. It's wild fun. I had no idea as babies we learn to laugh so much. It's great to see the smiles and it's completely heart warming. My world stops and I get lost in his gaze. He will stop nursing sometimes and just look up and wait for me to say something. It's so loving and there is such a connection there it's just amazing.

*Special sentiments. As we are born, others move on. Souls interchange and life goes on in mind and heart. I want to send my blessings to my friends who have lost the center of their universe, and know we are thinking of you. There is nothing one can say, just that we love you.

Snookie can't be Chilean!

Just disgraceful! Indignant! Yuck!

http://www.popeater.com/2010/02/17/snooki-not-italian-chilean-jersey-shore/

She's apparently Chilean! Grr... she's such class... I hate to be put in a similar category... ugh. Nature vs. nurture? ugh.. still can't undo what the media does. Who lets these people on TV? I mean who goes by nicknames like JWOWW and SNOOKIE? What is that? Don't even tell me we are getting older? Will my son wear pink? Is it a generation gap I just won't be able to understand.

Oh the things our kids will put us through in time... I suppose I woun't understand just as my mother didn't when I was a teen.. and somehow I am still so excited to watch Gus grow everyday and imagine what he will be every stage of the way.

My First Night Out... without Gus....

So I was flip flopping about whether to go out or not last night but I am glad I did. I was invited (by Ms. Chrystalene) to the local Miss Expose Fitness (http://www.xposefitness.com/index.shtml) competition and it was great entertainment! Three categories can explain the nature of the event... chair and floor, pole princess and pole diva. It was so fun to watch, talent, strength and creativity! I am so hooked! I might go try a class at some point!

So I was out without Gus... I hated leaving him, and I tried to make it quick. I gave him a quick nursing at 1945 before I stepped out the door and left him with dad and plenty of milk in the fridge. I immediately reveled in the freedom of just me and my alpine radio in the truck (HD no less.. hubby installed HD receiver), and had some fun with myself.. I felt a rush of excitement I was doing something I had not done in a long time - going out on a Friday night. I felt some guilt about leaving Neil and Gus... for different reasons but I knew that I needed a change of scenery. Got to the gym and there were drinks but I opted for water - they didn't have anything yummy for my taste. And I found the girls. We were all invited by Chrystalene to root on one of her friends that she body painted for the competition. We all know Chrystalene for a variety of different reasons and everyone has such wonderful energy about them.

The show was great, there were about 8 competitors and they all looked like they were having so much fun doing their routines. It was just neat. Then after we packed it up and went to the Blue Martini - but they didn't have big enough table for us, then we went to Chevys and they were closing so they wouldn't seat us at the bar or otherwise, and then couldn't think of anything else that wasn't down town (and we didn't want to battle parking) so we ended up at the Double T diner... and we had a wonderful gathering and we ate what we felt like eating and enjoyed good conversation.

Did I miss Gus.. yes, but I didn't feel the overwhelming need to check in with him. I did wonder how dad was doing with him but I just pushed the thoughts out of my head and only thought positive and how much fun this was and it would be a while before I get to do it again. Sigh...

Moms... if you don't get out... make the time and find a sitter if dad isn't available! It was worth it, but I had my fill... even if I never got to that rum and coke I was hoping for. Water served it's purpose.. oh what did I have at the diner... of course... something yumm... carrot cake! (But it didn't have enough rasisins).

Gus is getting so much bigger and more interactive. He tries to copy when you talk to him sometimes, and he gets so excited over nothing and has so much fun. He is a bit independant now and we enjoy the time that gives us to do things around the house (although the house looks like a tornado ripped through it).

Time to get cleaning!

First there was poop and then there was Dad!

PS. Thank Aunt Cathy and Uncle Dick for the little red car, it's a hit!

POOP!
How does poop win every time? Because it happens so often. Little Gus is now 4 months old and he is pooping about once a day. Seems normal enough for him and well yesterday he didn't poop. But at 3 am when he was laying next to me fussing about dried boogers... he let it rip, and not a little either, explosive, and somehow just outside his diaper too. I think dad helped put that night time diaper on... hmm. Gets better... he does it again during today.. and sure enough outside the outfit.. who changed him last? Guess... no really guess... dad. Yup. I am not even going to comment on his diapering skills though... it's not worth the fuss.

More on Dad.
He's outside installing some high tech HD radio device so I can listen to the radio without the crackle. Not sure what I did to merit a new car radio receiver, but ok, I will take it and revel in the fact that he loves me and this is his weird way of showing it (that and the lovely Norman Love chocolates I got for Valentines).

So speaking of dads and babies, I tend to see a lot of families having dad, get up to do a feeding once a night to help with mom.. but how do you do it without waking dad? We co sleep most of the time but I try to get him in his bed some times but rather than hear him cry and cry and fuss many times I will just put him in bed with us and problem solved, he nurses and goes to sleep.

Now it's not for a lack of milk in the fridge (I seem to produce about 5 extra ounces a day that the little man doesn't need), but eh.. I just don't know how to ask dad to either do more with the baby or do more in the house, but that he can't have his cake and eat it too and have me serve him dinner every night... I might as well give up and buy him a silver platter... I love him and I guess this is how I show him I love him? (think of the tone that Anchorman uses when he's talking to his dog Baxter).

OK well anyways, too much love to argue, we both seem to avoid any confrontation because I am overly defensive and Neil just doesn't like talking about things when they seem to come up. Not sure how to better communicate but I guess Men and Women do have different ways of talking... is that to be overcome? Or should men go back to being the hunters and women return to the huts with babes and stick to foraging?

Don't get me wrong, dad is super cute with the little man, I just don't know how to better balance it all. Maybe I am trying and or expecting too much.

Being a working mom.
Sucks. Period. People look at you differently from the day you announce your pregnancy. They think that all of a sudden you plan on being less motivated on purpose and that you will never earn your keep again. But then the other mothers in the work place seem to let you "in" to the new club of photo sharing and story swapping. It's so weird, but with so many women in the work place it makes it slightly easier. In the Navy I think so far it's been a bit of a challenge and when the newness wears off and people begin to forget, then it will be easier for me again. Right now I think I am under such scrutiny. I already feel that my next evaluation is already set in motion based on my family. It's weird. I also find myself calmer at work, but that might be the oxytocin doing it's thing, since I am still breast feeding exclusively, I still get the pumping high.

So I have been trying to attend www.meetups.com groups (Hip mama's) but seems to me that there is too many stay at home moms that would rather do things during the day, which I get, and wish I could stay at home too. But I was thinking of starting my own meet up... ambitious working moms of Annapolis Unite!

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LIttle known facts about me

Home again, and starting to get stir crazy... wanna get to know me a bit?

I like wearing shoes.. which was NOT always the case
Yup, I get up, put on my cobians. I get the morning going and then on my way to the shower I only take them off just outside the tub, and promptly put them back on when I get out after I had dried my feet. I love these flippies in particular, they are super soft and worn out. I might have to get another pair. It's weird I know. In junior high after my dad passed away my family and I went on vacation to Turkey. Yes, we loved world travel as a family. And when we stopped in Ephesus... I refused to wear my shoes... so there I was walking around a very remains of an ancient city.. bare foot. I remember it hurting but I kept my mouth shut.. I was a bit of a hippie. I do love being barefoot in the summer though... maybe it's all the construction in my house? Hmm... I just don't like shoes.. too constricting.
Mail is the highlight of my day (even when I lived at home home).
I love mail. It's been 4 days without mail... it's so sad. I know I mostly get bills and junk but that occasional little piece of personal mail makes it all worth it! I like ordering stuff off the internet because it means I will get a package.. So ha! I keep my own mail coming. Sigh.. what happened to the days of pen pals? I think I will find a new pen pal. Even on the internet, we are so connected, yet so distracted. After school and even college I recall running out to the mail box, it was never too far... just to see what came. It's like a little present every day!

I like pulling out my extraneous hair. So primal.
Does anyone tweeze leg hair? I rationalize that I cannot get them all but it's kinda like a stress reliever. I know someone else who used to do it too on the phone when we were teens. .. so I know I am not the only one. I mean.. it's relaxing in a weird sort of self preening way. Maybe that's why monkies preen? Nah... must be a primal thing... I just am one of those people that answers those calls. Maybe I should start screening primal calls... eh.. nah.

I like big words.
Yup, love them. I have a book that teaches me words... grown up words. I get excited when I get to use one. I also get sad when they get used against me and I have to look the up.. like that "caustic" one that was worked against me... grrr. I still learned a new word, Yippie~

I love to bake.
If you didn't know.. I loooove cooking. I mean really love cooking. But only when there is someone to eat it. It's strange... if I know hubby doesn't want it, then I don't make it either.. it's boring. But if I can bring baked goods to work, I get excited like a kid.

Do you ever get so excited for no reason and feel like running or jumping? I wonder if it's happening more often because I am not exercising and using this pent up energy. I feel like a total kiddie! I get choked up even. It's fun.

poop in hand

Gus pooped everywhere last night! We had to laugh... we were on the bed... and Gus had pooed... so I got everything ready got the diaper half off... and sure enough.. a little fart made some yellow bubbles... we laughed, Neil couldn't believe how much gas he had.. and then pffffttt... poop in hand, up my sleeves, but missed the bed! Yeah!!

But then there of course is more... as soon as I clean him up, get him ready then comes the puke... I had nursed him a while and then he wasn't feeling too good I guess, but he let it rip and from my shoulder to the ground it had sounded like I had dropped a bowl of soup, with chunks.

The fun parts of being mom! Oh I laughed after I had changed into my third night shirt! So funny... we are such messy little creatures.

Snow snow snow!!! I can't believe how much snow we got.. it's somewhere between 20 and 30 inches!

I still have no hearing in my right ear which drives me crazy but Gus is doing significantly better in day care this past week. He is taking his full bottles of 4 oz each! I am so proud of him! He must be feeling a lot better. At night his boogers still drive him nuts though and we have to give him a nasal lavage and a little massage... saline drops rock! Huge boogers come out when we used them.

Gus' new thing this past week is grabbing items in his reach. If something is on him or in his vicinity he will grab it and bring it to his face. Sometimes he chews on it (like the blanket or the taggies) or he will just make funny sounds with it. He even swats at things that dangle over his head, especially the octopus with the rattle on it. He holds his hands a lot, which I guess is all in his developmental range! Yeah!

But one of the most significant thing he did last week was play a game of copy cat! He was soooo cute... making some squeaky noises with his mouth so i decided to play a long and copy him. He then again copied me back, we went back and forth for about 5 minutes. He is hilarious. We laughed. He also has been copying laughter. When my mom was here last weekend was the second time he did that, and yesterday he did it again for a third time. When you laugh at him he gets hysterical with laughter, as long as you are laughing.. it's like he's copying.. but he belly laughs! It's overly overly cute.

Neil got him to sit up a bit yesterday, I suppose he is almost at sitting up age, I am excited for him, he will be able to sit and play! I think he will enjoy the world a lot better. Especially when he's frustrated with the view of the ceiling.

For nighttime romps this kid is out by 8 pm.. there seems to be a window though and if we miss it, he's up till 10! Grr. So I definitely try to get him sleeping by 730. Seems to be the golden time for him. He will stay asleep until we dress him for day care but then goes back to sleep for the ride in normally. He sleeps a lot during the day, guess babies need lots of sleeping for lots of growing. He's almost four months.. next week we will go to the doc again for weight, length and another round of shots. None to happy about that, he felt miserable for a few days after the last ones. Yuck. Maybe I will have dad take him.. well no, I have the boob.. and he liked nursing afterward to calm him down. eh. We will see.

Well off to make something warm. It's chilly out and the snow I think is insulated us in and all but it's still nippy. Gus is whining too... must attend to the little cries.

Don't get sick!

Or really just don't get sick. I got sick and now my milk is drying up. I am in a bit of a panic in hopes of it will come back with constant water intake and baby stimulation. I don't know if it was the sudafed or if it's just because I am sick but it's sad. I don't want little man to have to suffer! He will have to take the bottle!!! He is getting so fussy at the breast!

Oh I just can't wait to be better. Think positive, think positive. It seems to me from what I have read that the milk will return once the illness is gone. So keep thinking positive!

The kiddo seems to be feeling a heck of a lot better though. He has some mild congestion and from some readings, kids never get it as bad as you do as long as they are breastfeeders. Neat stuff. I guess all those great antibodies my body is making to fight them off are being passed. Yum!

So my ear is still clogged, and everything sounds to me as if I was sitting in a box or something. Makes it difficult to carry on any conversation or watch TV. Fun stuff.

On the good note, mom is here for the weekend and is hanging out and made us some soup yesterday (Neil is sick too) which was super nice. Oh and she made some muffins. mmm. Not that I can taste, but I can imagine tastes. Not being able to smell put a kink in my taste reception. It stinks... or actually it doesn't.. hehe.. pun intended!

Lint, cheese, wax, gross!

Lint is out of control, it dominates all the little folds of my son's skin! It feels like every time I turn around there is a new ball of dark lint between his fingers or toes. It's humorous really and makes for some extra maintenance, and we laugh about it. It's amazing how he collects it.

Now there is something much grosser than lint, and all moms can back me on this one... the cheese. The cheese behind his knees, the cheese behind his ear, in his ear, and especially under his chin after a good spit up day. I know this is gross, but it's wild how all these little folds collect "stuff". We went to the doctor last week (18 pounds... a bit sickly) and his toes were covered in lint when I realized it (he had been wearing dark socks. But before I lost my sense of smell with this cold, I was able to also realize that his little feet smelled like feet! Hehe. Sock lint must be one reason!

Oh and ears! This kid makes more ear wax in a day than I do in a week! Thank goodness for those little baby Qtips, we have to use them religiously! And on the days I miss out, it seems to form little balls and falls out, so I occasionally find little balls of wax lying next to him, that no doubt had fallen out of his ear! Funky!!!

Babies are awesome! It's wild how over the top anal we moms can be. So in cave man days I suppose you would probably have just left all the gunk there, jeeze, I have no idea how a human baby would survive outside of life with it's modern conveniences and nuances. I mean really, there are tribes that still live in the bush in other countries - how do they do it. If you have a crying baby wouldn't that attract the beasts that would love to have him/her as a snack? We are not exactly quiet as babies... I don't think we would survive. I guess that's what makes the society we live in today so unique when comparing and contrasting with previous eras.

Ok enough with my deep thoughts.. have a wonderful Sunday! Hoping for those eyes to stay blue!

Another Friday!

Mean people muted, work week completed somewhat, and some paint on our walls.. that sums the week up! I love Friday, and I only worked three days this week! I took Tuesday off and Wed I was at a conference, Thursday I proctored the CPO Advancement exam, and today, well today I left work at noon... I don't feel well and I am waiting on Eric to come and finish painting parts of the house - finally making more progress in the house. Got rid of that 'Home depot' orange color! Yeah!

So Gus and I are still completely sick, stuffy, coughing, achy yucky. He has been sleeping a lot and loosing some weight. I think he has been loosing weight since he started day care though, I dunno, we will see, but he's happy and the doc gave me some tylenol in case his fever gets too high. But all in all it's the boogers that are getting us down.. not being able to breath at night sucks!

SO funny story, has of my breastfeeding moms squirted themselves in the eye yet? I don't know what I was doing but I was trying to get little man latched, and surely... I moved the wrong way, flinched and all of a sudden, and I saw it coming, a stream of milk aimed at my cornea... eeek... it got me! I was laughing so hard! It was funny...

I need to go lay down though and catch some zzzzz's while I can.. Gus is napping from the car still (in his car seat too still.. is that bad?). But I am going to grab him and snuggle with him. sigh.. working for the weekends... I understand the song much better now.

I have to get this off my chest. People are mean. They always say kids are mean, but really, those kids just grow up to be mean adults! The poking fun, the bullies, the gossipers, and evil doers. They all grow up and it seems I always have one or two in my life that I just can't get rid of. It must be some sort of karma or the balance of good and evil ever present. At work there is one man that just has it out for me. He's not even in the Navy but he has made it his job from the minute I returned to work (actually it started back in August) to make my life miserable and make sure I have a worse shot at promotion. He even thinks I am only "in it for me" and my promotion. The guy is a piece of work. I am one of the most altruistic people I know, and somehow I was called caustic by this guy's buddy - to my face! It's amazing, I can't wait until I am not in a line of work where you have to step over one another to be in the good graces with the people above you. I don't kiss butt and I take care of all those I work with... hmm... I know I am doing good and practicing good leadership, I don't need some unhappy unmarried childless old airman that can't retire because he institutionalized to tell me who he thinks I am. OK, I feel better, I will stick to what I know and avoid this tyrant from here out, as long as I don't have to work for him again... sigh. I truly believe the world works in mysterious ways, because I was overlooked for the position that would have had me working for him, and that's probably a good thing, it will keep me sane, and hopefully off this guy's radar in time.

On to more fun things... ever seen this link? http://www.peeandpoo.com
I feel I have now seen it all.. you can make a stuffed animal out of anything... it's no longer limited to "animals". LOL!

I feel better already! I took Tuesday off and the federal government took Monday off (MLK Day!), so I have a nice long four day weekend with my little man! I love spending time with him and seeing those smiles. We went to the mall yesterday and I bought my first pair of non-pregnancy jeans. It was scary... I ended up in the Gap, they have some cute long sleeves I bought a couple weeks ago. SO I stopped in again, their jeans are so soft. I mean they are pricey but they were well made. I have to stop buying crap. I cheap out and my clothes always fall apart. Soooo I tried on the 10 short and viola, I fit, I tried on the 12 and it was just slightly too big but they would have been more comfortable. I convinced myself to purchase the size 10 - and remind myself that I am still loosing some more of this weight if I ever get back in the gym! It's hard to believe a year ago I was wearing a size 6, ((sigh)) but I guess a little extra effort will help me get back there! So there you have it! I am going to wear them today, with my new green stripped shirt and a normal bra. I also stopped in to Victoria's Secret and treated myself to a couple new bras. So get this, I measured in at a 36D! I have never been much of a bra wearer because I was so small. I went from sub-A cup to a D! Amazing! And the girls weren't even full (of milk) at the time of measure! So she had me try a few on and they were great! So I bought two, it was a splurge. VS is super expensive, but it was fun and it made me feel so good about myself.

Mall strolling. Walking the mall can be bad for the wallet but great for my mind and body. I get moving. I walked the mall yesterday for about 4 hours. I had to have burned some calories! Maybe I should go for another walk earlier today with the babe, avoiding the crowds. Hmm.. Tomorrow I have my walking group from meetup.com. It's fun the gal that runs it is a trainer and she has us do all sort of calisthenics.

MORE POOP! If you can stand another poop story here goes: We were sleeping away, all three of us in the family bed and Gus was stirring. He was a bit hungry and I rolled over and provided him his usual late night buffet and then he starts fidgeting, and whining. I figured maybe gas and sure enough he starts letting them go. I giggle. He had not pooped in a day and a half and it sounded like here it was going to come, at 2 in the morning. Yup... I heard him sigh in relief. And then more, and more. I knew I had to change his drawers. But of course, all that back up... it was everywhere. No sooner did I undo his Pajamas did I find poop. It was all the way up his back. I had to give him a wet wipe bath, I was trying not to wake Neil, but I was laughing. Thank goodness he let us know at least, it would have been a nightmare to clean him if he had been sitting in it all night.. eww.. Well it took us a bit to get back to sleep so we actually hung out in his room in the rocker.. that rocker was so worth it! I can actually sleep on it with him when we need to. He is so cute but I wish he could fall asleep better. He's just a wakeful little guy sometimes. Like last night. He was all awake for a short while, but slept most of the evening so when it came time to go up and we stretched it a little late to like 11pm he had been out a while! But in moving him he woke up, and didn't go back to sleep till around 1230. I tried to put him down and he wasn't having it. We found him his favorite pacifier (the Soothie) and he went to town but not to sleep. So finally I had to pick him up and walk him around the room. Neil wanted to bring him down stairs but I try to discourage it. He will get into a bad habit and TV is not the answer, he needs to learn to bore himself to sleep. So I gave in and brought him to bed and finally we all passed out. I am exhausted though, it's been a few nights that I have not quiet slept right. He wakes me up all the time, so I get broken sleep normally but the other night the couple hours we spent awake killed me. So here I am avoiding going back to bed because I know it's such a struggle. And my eyes hurt. I hear Neil stirring upstairs. Something tells me little man is awake.

Time to go up... it's almost 7 am.. I only pumped 2 ounces which means the little guy ate more than I thought before I came down.

Have a great week everyone!!

Poop Everywhere!

Gustave is now 13 weeks! Tomorrow he will be three months and he is such a little peach. He still has schedule issues but he's enjoying life and growing like a weed... actually maybe faster than a weed, it's wild. He has to be almost 20 pounds now, and he has outgrown about all his 3 month clothes. I started buying 12 months clothes so it will last him a bit longer.

This week's top story.
I decided yesterday would be a great day to go for a short stroll in Annapolis and get a bite to eat. It was chilly so we all got very very bundled up and went. Gus got to wear one of his cutie outer layers... he was warm warm warm, I wanted to be him. Well we went to Treaty of Paris, a little restaurant in one of the Inns of Maryland - very very old hotels in the heart of Annapolis. They had two fireplaces and one was crackling and smelling lovely. We had popovers as an app and then lovely breakfasts (traditional eggs, waffles etc). It was yum. Gus was also using his new seat and sat at the table with us.. he was so cute until he decided to start fussing. He had not pooped the day prior and it was bound (no pun intended. . . heehe) to come at the most inconvienent of times. Sure enough I fed him a little and there it came... we were the only ones in the restaurant thank goodness, because it was rather inappropriate, the sounds were icky.. we were laughing and glad to hear him feeling better. But now he was uncomfortable, I went to go change him in this historic building, so of course there was no change table. On top of the sink counter here's my naked babe... and he had pooped everywhere, it blew out the back of the diaper, yellow stuff everywhere... all the way up his back all over his under shirt onsie... omg, it was just everywhere, so I pull the diaper away, and trying to avoid collateral damage... oh yeah I just threw the onsie away too, after dissecting it way from his little body. The stuff was so nuclear it glowed on my skin! He's now crying, and naked in the bathroom. A lady that walked through giggled with me a little, I think she knew my pain. The outfit is toast too, I can't rationally put it back on him... it's totally gross! I am not sure it will recover, it was one of those fuzzy velour outfits. Ug, so I put the spit up cloth on him and hustle down stairs so that I can get back to the table where I left the diaper bag with his new chnage of clothes. Poor little man... he was upset, and he nursed a few more minutes and we go on our way. The cool air was appealing to him, he seems to like it. Well he went to sleep within minutes and enjoyed the rest of our outing (we got hot cocoas!).

The fun... after that we actually went to Toys R Us, the kid is outgrowing his infant car seat fast, in another week or two he will have to switch as he will not fit the darn thing. LOL.. I just can't believe how fast he grows!

Ear Wax and Spit up

Things I seem to have forgotten to discuss... yeah so the amount of ear wax this guy produces is amazing! Do all babes do that? And to boot this kid spits up plenty and when he nurses milk goes everywhere.. and ends up behind his ears, under the chin in skin folds and if I don't catch it, omg it stinks like funky cheese!! UGH!! Just more interesting facts about little Gus that you never wanted to know!

As for Spit up... wow, he has some days that are just like exorcist spit up... but cheesy instead of bloody... ewww

Twenty Ten!

It's yet again another year, and I have so much to be grateful for. I sit here in my dining room watching Gustave sleep on his video monitor (I left him in our bed after his 5 am nursing) and he sounds like he may be stirring.. nope.. still sleeping. I eat my coffee flavored oatmeal (I forgot to take a coffee cup out of my keurig-) thinking all the wonderful things I am grateful for.

GUS
Gus is amazing, and weighing in about 17+ pounds by now and nearly 3 months old (11 Jan he will be 3 months) he can roll over (when he feels like it), he is trying to sit up (which looks like a very awkward sit up), and he loves to be "standing" in our laps. I had no idea how "big" he was for a baby his age until people brought it to our attention, so I looked up some baby growth charts.. and sure enough he's in the 90thish percentile... so yessire.. he's a big'un!

He has started to laugh, he smiles at everyone... and I mean everyone.. in the mall he's a flirt. He's starting to see further away and it's wonderful to watch all the developments. He's begining to really grab at stuff... it's so cute to watch his daddy put things into his hands and watch him wave them around and then try to eat them. Soooo cute.. I am so in love with the little bug, I can't imagine him not being in my life.

Work.. poo
Work has not changed, office politics, frownie people, negative energy... eh... I find myself surprised at my lack of interest in the office. I was so "gung-ho" and now.. eh.. I would rather be home taking care of Gus in his early years. But we don't have that option. The Navy has a pilot program to let people take a long vacation (up to 2 years) but with no pay... and unfortunately we can't do that right now until we get rid of the house in Texas... yes.. we still own a house in Texas... and it's finally on the market after my lousy tenants destroyed it. We had to put so much money into it (about 10K) to get it back in order... ugh... glad that negative stuff is behind me. My tenant was a mother of three and her hubby was an invalid. My previous neighbor and myself truly think she was a crack addict... and man she used to say some nasty things to me. Oh well... took her to court.. and she owes me forever now... I doubt we will ever see that money back.

Back to happy thoughts.. I took the day off! LOL! Yup.. I went back for two days, took today off and am back to work tomorrow again. I will slowly take on responsibility again but I want to make sure if I need a day with Gus during the week that I will take it damn it! I miss all our day time nursing sessions.. so quiet, so cozy, just gazing at him while he does the most natural thing.

His eyes so far are still blue too... and they are so deep.. I love just looking at them. Even now as he sleeps, I can't wait until he wakes up so we can play, he's almost due for some more mother's milk too. I have been so fortunate with the milk too. I have so much I am able to save about 5 ounces a day in the freezer that he never gets too. I guess all the extra pumping has paid off and I have an extra supply. I found a place to donate to once I am in abundance (I think I have about 100+ ounces... they had to move to the deep freeze, just took too much space in the freezer..!!!).

Do any of you mommies still have terrible gas? I seem to just have some horrible things coming from my rear. Might be the veg diet, but... oh well... I guess after birth the body changes so much! Oh I have to get on my Wii to see how much I weigh. We dont' have a scale... so I use the Wii. I wish I could be running again, but I can't give myself the time away from Gus. I guess I will work it back in to my schedule soon enough. Awww... I can see Gus dreaming of nursing.. he is making the movements with his little chin ... I can see his dream now... suck suck suck... breath... suck suck suck... breath... so cute. I can't wait to wake him up... ok I know.. new mother here.. give me time!

sigh... if only we could have it all. I mean the respect of being mother and having a job. As women we worked so hard to get "equal rights" etc, but right I just want the right to be a mother and well... I can't. In places like Sweden and Canada they give their new moms at least a year from what I have heard.... paid! Too bad our society is still disgruntle from the feminist movement I suppose. I mean.. I am all about power to the woman, but why sacrifice one of the most natural and meaningful things you will ever do with your life? And we don't get these moments back either. He will start walking and not want to spend all the time in mommy's arms.. hehe.. call me selfish! I don't want to miss a thing and having to leave him 8 hours in Day care.. is poo.. actually it's 9 hours in daycare... ugh. I hate it. Makes me feel icky. But on the same token, I felt pretty free at work.. but I was always wondering what the little guy was up to. Did he roll over today? Did he have a conversation? Do the ladies there even try to converse with him? I love when I get Gus going.. he gaaass and makes all sorts of cute noises and converses with me. It's so cute! They say it helps build his grasp of how we communicate. Eh.. I can hear him breathing on the monitor.. awww.. Ok, well time for me to get a bit organized, catch up on some dishes... I just can't believe how much time the house demanded from me... I just had no idea that it would be like this.

I love it.

To all the mothers out there... we rock!