Monday

I am supposed to be at work. Neil said it's a bad day. So I am going to have to wing it and do what I can. I can take care of this and that this morning and then leave the babe with Neil. Fun. I need to square away child care!

Ok, so the days are flying by, I can't believe it's December tomorrow!

Motherhood has been a joy but it has put into perception how much time we as humans waste on the BS. Life is too short, and there are more important things, but how do you shrug it all aside. I feel guilty because I want to return to work, I feel guilty that I have to put the little man in Child care, I hate it. But I am excited he will meet other babies and have an opportunity to socialize himself so he can make friends as he grows. But I will miss all our day time breastfeedings. I am not looking forward to pumping at work. No siree. But it's what I am going to have to do, period. I fear it all, but I feel like I want to be in the Navy again too! Neil doesn't seem to understand that. Do the men really get it? Do they understand? I wish I could just stay home and that would make it better.

OK, well we are going to get Gus' belly button check out today, medical paperwork for child care, dental for me hopefully - I am sure I have a couple cavities and then try to organize this house a bit. It's a nightmare!!!